Darfur

although there's more information about Darfur nowadays than over the last few years, there still isn't much. this new web-based interactive 'game' helps raise awareness over the issues faced by all the IDPs trapped there. it's quite good. have a look!

http://www.darfurisdying.com/

black tie dinner

last night, i went to a black tie dinner with some friends. i knew it'd be expensive, but i decided i'd earned myself a treat, and as i already had the dress, i just had to pay for the food. exhorbitantly priced, but what the hell. it was good. especially the cinnamon pear... i could've eaten ten of those, easy. when we got to our sixth and final course (dessert), i actually had no space left for it, despite all the portions being small...

and it was nice to really dress up for once. guys in dinner jackets, girls in nice gowns. there aren't really many occasions to go all out, so i'm glad my friend organised this. for once i was made up, wore nail polish,... the works. and i felt like a queen. which is nice, once in a while ;)

warm october

for the first time since they started recording the weather in Geneva (1818), the chestnut trees are out in bloom in town. which generally means spring is on the way... except, as we all know, it really isn't. so technically, this really isn't good.

but the weather has been really lovely this week, and today i spent a lot of time just enjoying it. before lunch, was sitting in a park overlooking the mountains, watching the leaves fall on the ground whilst enjoying the sun. then i went for my usual walk. i found a place to sit, closed my eyes and just listened to the sounds around me, the leaves, the birds, the breeze... it was divine!

astronomical...love!

was walking down to the pool bar last night when this guy stopped me in the street. i thought he needed directions, cos he started by saying 'excuse me'. but then, he seemed a bit lost. probably too drunk. then he managed to say this: 'i love you...astronomically! you are the woman of my life. please, have a drink with me.' i thanked him for his words (and had a spring in my step after that), but declined. as i left, he asked me not to leave, to have coffee instead, not to run away... it was kind of sweet. the guys later said i was heartless for turning him down, but he was drunk, had barely seen me 5 seconds before declaring his undying love and even if you believe in love at first sight, well...

positive attitude

it's 'terrible', but since leaving teenager-hood, i can't seem to be depressed for more than a few hours at the time. so it's back to being positive. go, go, go!

luckless luck

most mornings i wake up and make a point of reminding myself of how lucky i am. i don't live in a war-torn, famine- or illness-ravaged country. the government, while corrupt etc, is kind of doing its thing and not forcing me to think this or that. i am healthy, have a reasonably good job, a place to live, a loving and caring family and some very good friends. so i know that compared to, let's face it, most people on this planet, i am incredibly lucky. but right now, the only thing i really want seems to be the only thing i can't get. someone to love me. and it's just starting to really wear me down.

free hug campaign

if you haven't yet seen this, you really should!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vr3x_RRJdd4

FEEL THE LOVE!

the boot story

2 weeks ago yesterday, i finally pulled myself together and ventured into the world of high quality shoe stores to find myself a good pair of long boots. after a good 45 mns of trying different pairs, i finally found one i liked (meaning: black, low heel, not pointy). hurray! and then paid the price for it (a lot more money than i've ever spent on shoes, including the made-to-measure sandals i treated myself to a few years ago).

the very next day, i took my new shiny boots out for a stroll. 2 hours later, one boot was broken! i am not kidding. the zipper had gone. weird. thank god i wasn't at work! went back to the shop and they exchanged the boot. we checked the zipper and decided it would work.

a few days later, i wore the boots all day. no problem. i breathed a sigh of relief... then, on Tuesday, everything was going well when the zipper went. this time i was at work, but luckily wearing trousers, so you couldn't see it. but i could feel it! 6 hours of walking with an open boot is not the best feeling in the world. i finally managed to bring them back in this morning. i just wanted my money back, but that might not happen. first, they have to see if they can get the boot repaired. in a way, i hope they can, cos i really love those boots and it'd be a shame to lose them, especially if they refuse to give me a refund and i have to choose another pair in the shop. there is no way i'm spending that much money on shoes that are not boots, and there was only another pair i liked and they didn't have my size. so people, cross your fingers (and toes)!

an experiment

during the lesson, the other day, the question was what you would use if you didn't have pliers. my student was talking about using pliers to help with connecting two wires through a domino (i believe that's the name - any DIYer out there, feel free to tell me if i'm wrong). i suggested using chopsticks, which he said was impossible. i couldn't see why. so he said he'd bring the stuff for me to try.

and so today, true to his word, he came with a domino, a screwdriver (to screw the wires in place - although he hadn't actually brought wires) and a pair of chopsticks. it was hilarious, but i managed to do it. there's even a picture of that now, probably floating on the internet...

hope?

ok, so went to a big party in a church last night. the kind of party you have in nightclubs, except we'd rented out a church. so there was full on techno/80s and other types of music and boy did we (tinkie and i, that is) get the party going!

anyway, J. and i spent half the night glued to each other. enough so that a friend of mine at one point said she thought my boyfriend (meaning J.) had been lost by a comment i'd made. had to tell her we weren't going out. managed to keep the word 'yet' out of that sentence, not wanting to jeopardise anything. mostly, J. said some stuff that couldn't possibly mean anything else than what i think he means, but then, he did have quite a lot of alcohol in him already, so i can't really be sure. clearly, we need to talk. or get down to some non-drunken business...

colourful autumn

i think it might be because i no longer live right bang in the countryside anymore that i take more notice of the smells of autumn that are reeling in with the morning fogg and the afternoon sun. at the house, i was surrounded by them all the way through the season so that i probably became too used to them. now that i live in a town, i am once more aware of the pleasures of those smells. and here and there, dotted around, are trees with leaves that are going bright red. i'm lucky in that two prime examples are located just outside my windows. but of course, it's nothing like Japan, where autumn colours are truly amazing. for the past week, i've really felt that i should be up in some mountain, admiring the colourful momiji, hopefully finishing off the day in a nice rotemburo (outdoors hotspring), where i could both bathe in incredibly hot water and enjoy the view. at times like these, i really, really miss Japan. i know i've already posted this picture, but it was so long ago, and it really shows you what i'm talking about. enjoy it!

in Dazaifu

gorgeous moon

these last few nights, i've noticed that the moon has been amazingly beautiful. hanging low in the sky, golden, orange, or even bordering on pink. really nice. a sight to enjoy...

mad world

it seems the world is currently populated by a hell of a lot of selfish idiots. North Korea: do they care that if it really was the bomb we think they set off, water resources et al. will have been contaminated? do they?? and the mother in Brasil, who buried her live newborn baby (with placenta and all) in the mud, did she care about its life?? thank goodness someone found the baby before it died! and the four kids in France, did they really need to gang up on, and hit the little girl who was eating a sandwich during Ramadan??

compared to a lot of people, my childhood was pretty rosy, but i really doubt my kids' childhood will be just as nice...

my week - evenings

monday: Japanese lesson
tuesday: teaching, followed by drinks
wednesday: pool
thursday: drinks with old student
friday: 'reunion' drinks - probably all night
saturday: 6000 members party in a cathedral
sunday: no plans... yet

breathe

when i went for a walk over a month ago, i decided i'd have to make time for it on a weekly basis, cos it was so good. life, of course, came in the way and i didn't really have a chance to go. until today.and it was amazing!

the sky was a clear blue and the sun was shining. off i went on the small path surrounded by fields, woods and a river, with sounds of cow-bells, horse hooves and occasional dogs barking in the distance. with magnificent views over the Jura mountain and a snowy Mont Blanc. it was so peaceful. i hadn't realised until i got there how much i needed it. needed to get out of the city, out of the noise, the pressure, the speed. it was as if everything just melted away. i walked as slowly as possible to stretch it out. it was hard to come back home after that. i wish it could have lasted all day...

radiators

i started this process back in mid-August, but as we all know, these things take time in France. this morning, my three new radiators were finally installed. hurray! apart from heating better and faster, they also consume a lot less energy, so there should be a significant reduction in my heating bills this winter (whilst also being good for the environment - does this sound too much like an ad?).

And So It Goes (Billy Joel)

In every heart there is a room
A sanctuary safe and strong
To heal the wounds from lovers past
Until a new one comes along

I spoke to you in cautious tones
You answered me with no pretense
And still I feel I said too much
My silence is my self defense

And every time I've held a rose
It seems I only felt the thorns
And so it goes, and so it goes
And so will you soon I suppose

And if my silence made you leave
Then that would be my worst mistake
So I will share this room with you
And you can have this heart to break

And this is why my eyes are closed
It's just as well for all I've seen
And so it goes, and so it goes
And you're the only one who knows

So I would choose to be with you
That's if the choice were mine to make
But you can make decisions too
And you can have this heart to break


copyright 1989 Billy Joel

do you get it?

so, he's sending all the right signals, but he says he doesn't want to go further. i don't get it. i mean, on the one hand he obviously likes me. and in the email he sent me to explain that it wasn't a good idea for us to move on to another type of relationship, he also said he really liked me and really wouldn't mind spending more time with me than he already did. does anyone get it? cos i certainly don't. and no, he's really not gay.